Yoga Literally saved my life. And this is not an exaggeration. Before starting my practice, I was seeking so many things to heal from years of self doubt and dysfunction. But once I began this deliberate relationship with myself to heal in this way, all the illusions I had been anchored in started to dissolve or were removed from my life. Now I can’t say that I know the moment that this shift began for me. What I can say is that setting the intention to get on my mat and allow whatever the postures were bringing to me to flow was the best thing I could have done for myself at the time. My journey with Yoga began in 2001. I’d been dabbling here and there via YouTube. I would watch all these really bendable people( that’s what I called them) lol, contort there bodies and claim it brought them some type of peace. i just laughed.
How could standing on your head bring you peace. matter of fact, how could trying to stand on your head bring you peace. I was terrified by that one posture alone. So I continued to dabble and just be an observer of Yoga. In 2016 ,I purchased several books from my local Goodwill as well as online through Amazon about various Yoga Masters or those who had used there own practice to bring them to there own fulfillment. I Read and absorbed some of the information contained in these works. but I was still puzzled by the consensus that Yoga had shifted them in the direction of there own personal peace.
Fast forward to 2017. I decided to step out of my comfort zone and I took a Weekend Certification called Golden Body Meditation. Still a part of my dabbling but more hands on because I left my home and traveled to participate in an actual Yoga Workshop. It was a Life changing experience. During that weekend program I learned that Yoga and Meditation go hand in hand. It never occurred to me in all my years of dabbling that these 2 things worked best together. But that weekend program taught me the strength of not only my Body but my mind. I was heavier physically than I am now and although I had been a on the fence Vegetarian for over 17 years, I was not in great shape. My mind on the other hand took to the processes with ease. I allowed the instructors to guide me and an unknown direction but i let go of fear and any apprehension that I had held for such things in the past. I felt the peace coming. It gave me an eagerness to continue to transform. After that weekend I booked a 2 week 200-hr Yoga Training in Jamaica, my Island home. I had decided that if I really wanted to heal then I couldn’t keep doing the same routines in my life that kept me stuck. I had to transform intentionally. So I went to Jamaica. This was another lesson in Trust of peace.
I left my children in the care of others. I left my Job and my old life as I now say and weekend truly reborn. I allowed the two weeks to cover me in every sense. I opened my usual introverted personality to total strangers. Learning that we all had similarities as to our purpose of the current adventure that we were on. I participated in many Cultural practices that I never would have thought would allow me to be in tune with myself as I am today. But I allowed it all. That is what Yoga has given me that I am most grateful for. Allowance. The definition of Allowed is the amount of something that is permitted, especially within a set of regulations or for a specified purpose. I had been restricting my life from everything that I claimed I wanted and in turn lived a stressful existence. I wanted to Joy, Peace, Confidence and Abundance, but I refused to allow them in. By holding on to my doubts and fears as to why I didn’t have them, or couldn’t. But Growing in my Journey with Yoga showed me that it is up to me what all I receive through my Allowance of that very thing. I now am allowing Peace in me to be the peace I have sought for years. And share that Peace with others. I now allow the Joy in me to be what I give to others and the world. I now allow the confidence in me to live my life fully, unapologetically me and hold space for others to do the same. I now allow Abundance in all things to flow to me and through me to others without attachment. Yoga has been and continues to be a journey of the cultivation of peace for me. It keeps me stress free. It is my Place of peace, A peace that is me.