In 2018 I had a profound thought about the journey that Motherhood has taken me on and it sticks with me to this day. it was eye opening and transformative to the relationship that I am cultivating with my children today. It all started with a Facebook group that I was a part of. There was a questioned posed and I drew this response and expanded it to fit my situation at the time. I wasn’t striving for philosophy. I just to wanted to make sense of what motherhood meant to me. You see, my children were at different stages of development, teenage adolescent and preteens. So in the bridge that connected them to me I wondered how things would turn out.
I have shared on various platforms that I was a working mom for many years. What I have not shared it that I was struggling to live the American dream. To provide for my family, have all the essentials of life and maintain my sanity. And even in the midst of all of that, I rarely considered that I was Mastering the most important Job I had been given. In my opinion, I was and am a great mother. Where I fall short, I excel in other areas. But I never considered motherhood as being the mastery that I am here to perfect in my own life experience. I am there provider until they can take on more of that role for themselves, as one has already done. But How is this an experiment or experience of building mastery? There is no guide book and written formula that all mothers follow. Each one navigates a path that they are either thrust on or delicately travel. No matter the course of this journey, it remains the things I aspire to improve on, come what may. I have made so many mistakes as a mother and at times I let that internal criticism eat away at the best intentions I had for my children. I have been criticized by other mothers for not maintaining a standard that they thought I should have followed for my children and chose to isolate from others for fear of judgement. Now I allow the process to flow through me, no overreaching, catching myself when I feel the critics inside and outside of myself heckling nearby. Sometimes we can get caught in the ideals of parenting. Trying to outdo others or even be “better” than our parents were to us. There is mastery in the mess. There is mastery in the mundane. There is mastery in the miracle of each misstep that motherhood can take you through. There is mastery in the many beautiful memories you’ll make. There is mastery in breaking generational and cultural patterns to live peacefully within your own family. There is mastery in not anchoring on the single mother bandwagon to be a mother of children and that’s it. There is mastery in picking up the pieces of broken dreams that you wanted your life and family dynamic to be. Just be true to you and master what Motherhood is and what it can be to you. I am that I am.
Mothers that I admire:
My Practical parenting eBook:
Youtube Channels I love to watch:
Here’s a powerful Video to inspire the journey of Mastery to all Mothers in all hoods: